Truth

Can men and women be truly just friends?

The belief that men and women can't be friends ultimately stems from history, when women traditionally stayed at home while men worked. Therefore, the only time they spent together on a regular basis was for romance. Obviously, times have changed.

These days, men and women share everything from jobs, schools, and church to sports, restaurants, social gatherings and much, much more. To me, times have made it to where men and women alike can share similar interests, similar beliefs, similar values, similar personalities, and similar thoughts without even contemplating the thought of romance or sex. I've written about friendships before, and this is a little excerpt from that piece.

"I want a friend that not only will always be there, but will always want to be there. I want someone that will tell you straight up how it is, no bull crap. I want them to have integrity. I want them to show that they care. I want them to call me out when I'm being stupid. I want them to tell me if something troubling is on their mind.

"I want them to feel comfortable talking about anything and everything with me. I want them to have respect for themselves and others, as well as me. I want them have faith when others don't. I want someone to fight for me, not against me. I want them to know they're needed, and vice versa. I want them to love me at my best, and love me more at my worst.

"I want them to believe in me. I want them to support me, even when they don't agree. I want them to trust me wholeheartedly, and know that the feeling is mutual. I want them to cry with me. I want them to see me vulnerable without judgement. I want them to accept me for me. I want them to be who they are, and no one else. I want them to appreciate what they have. I want them to see."

No where in that writing do you see any mention of gender. Regardless of the natural drives we have as beings, friendship with the opposite sex is most definitely possible, and real. These days, there's a very popular superstition that men can't control their sexual thoughts and feelings towards women. Personally, I think that's absurd. I have numerous female friends that I consider to be really good, sincere friends. I have two that I actually consider to be best friends.

When it comes to flirting, that's one thing. I'll tell you first hand, my two best female friends and I have never flirted. It just seems weird. Yes, I've definitely flirted with others; and yes, I've thought about pursuing girls that have started out as my friends. However, does that hinder the fact that they are my friends now? I don't think so. Disagree? So be it. You're wrong. When friends become interested in each other is a completely different topic; I'll save that one for another day.

Studies show that 83% of people believe that men and women can be completely and truly just friends. The other 17% is either ignorant or lying. Or both.